Hello, Human Beans! Let’s talk about resilience and grace!

Being a human on this planet and existing is the most complex thing to do. With all the aspects of our personality congregating and concocting to make us who we are, it really is astonishing how diverse we can be from each other. In the potion that forms us, we also have several aspects to factor in. These can be our values and principles, our feelings, our journeys with others, our paths taken to become ourselves, and most of all – our life experiences.

More often than not, life experiences turn out to be ones that have a lesson or meaning that we must take from it. Whether we like them or not, they occur and bring light to parts of our life that may not be what it seems like. And regardless of the way we process it, they become a part of your timeline.

With adversity, it’s important to recognize to let the experience become a part of your timeline and not your whole life story. Adversity is tough, it is like climbing up an extremely steep mountain when every fiber of your being is screaming no. It’s a repeatedly reinforced swirl, that you’re in the middle of. The only thing you have in adversity, is hope and resilience.

Resilience is a habit that often doesn’t need conscious practice. Resilience is usually inherent in most of us. It’s something that comes from most of our not so pleasant experiences, or lessons. Being resilient takes strength. It comes from a great deal of pain and acceptance. Time will pass but getting through adversity in one piece, is a remarkable.

Most of us have had one or more pivotal moments in our life, full of hurt and pain, that we struggled through. Calling this character building is perhaps more appropriate yet diminishing. However after going through something that questioned every part of our capabilities so recklessly, we must rise from it. There is a more evolved version of ourselves, on the other side, that’s seen more of adversity and is more cautious of what we deal with at hand.

When adversity strikes, what if we tried to approach it with resilience and grace? Rather than just letting time pass and wash over it until it becomes nothing more than a small error in the big picture. A chance at resilience with grace is a redemption arc. It’s telling yourself,

 “Hey things are messed up right now, and I’m upset and I will feel every single feeling to the fullest, while knowing that it will get better”.

It’s also telling yourself,

“This is a chance for me to grow and learn from what was given to me, rather than letting this consume me".

Photo by  Brett Jordan Team  on  Unsplash

Grace is most certainly not quiet; grace is not avoiding the problem so it will go away. Grace can be loud and disrupting, as the acceptance of adversity should be. However, grace is also honouring the commitment to the journey and the ability to identify what can be taken from the situation. Grace is accepting the hand you were given. While the hope is frail in adversity, believing that you are bigger that the situation itself and that you can resolve the adversity at hand (after making sure you’ve expressed your feelings about it healthily), is what grace is. Practicing gratitude in moments where everything is falling apart is resilience with grace.

It is important in situations of adversity, to have a support network. Your headspace might not be a place you should be dwelling excessively – given that you are probably on fight or flight mode. Until you feel safe enough in your feelings, having a support network of those you can trust helps greatly. If you are the person in the midst of adversity, it is highly suggested reaching out to people that you feel safe enough with. People who can help you find your cause and be there to validate your emotions. If you’re not someone who likes to vocalize their problems excessively, or at all, sometimes company that you feel safe around can bring a lot more peace to the situation than staying by yourself. You don’t always have to talk about it.

Adversity might be just a part of your life story, but when you’re in the middle of it – it has the power to consume you. In scenarios like this, working with a mental health professional to help deal with this otherwise heavy and hurtful turmoil, can really help. Heart It Out is an organization that does a lot of beautiful work with respect to healing and mental health. You can learn more about them here.

As cliché as it sounds, in times of distress and adversity, handling situations with grace and being present for the way the situation folds out can really help you as an individual. Not only does it add to who you are as a person, but it also plays some part into shaping you into the already beautiful human that you are. We are all our experiences, whether we like it or not. All we can do is learn to love ourselves, which ultimately means accepting adversity we’ve been through. If you must go through it, do it with grace.

If you need more support, reach out to a therapist at Heart It Out today!

Photo by  Suzanne D. Williams Team  on  Unsplash